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A blind man walks into a restaurant and sits down. The waiter, who is also the owner, walks up to the blind man and hands him a menu. ‘I'm sorry sir, but I am blind and can't read the menu. Just bring me a dirty fork from the previous customer, I'll smell it and order from there.’
A little confused, the owner walks over to the dirty dish pile and picks up a greasy fork. He returns to the blind man's table and hands it to him.
The blind man puts the fork to his nose and takes in a deep breath. ‘Ah, yes that's what I'll have, meatloaf and mashed potatoes.’ Unbelievable, the owner says to himself as he walks towards the kitchen.
The cook happens to be the owner's wife and he tells her what had just happened. The blind man eats his meal and leaves.
Several days later the blind man returns and the owner mistakenly brings him a menu again. ‘Sir, remember me? I'm the blind man.’
‘I'm sorry, I didn't recognize you. I'll go get you a dirty fork.’ The owner again retrieves a dirty fork and brings it to the blind man. After another deep breath, the blind man says, ‘That smells great, I'll take the Macaroni and cheese with broccoli.’
Once again walking away in disbelief, the owner thinks the blind man is screwing around with him and tells his wife that the next time the blind man comes in he's going to test him. The blind man eats and leaves.
He returns the following week, but this time the owner see's him coming and runs to the kitchen.
He tells his wife, ‘Mary rub this fork around your vagina before I take it to the blind man.’ Mary complies and hands her husband the fork back. As the blind man walks in and sits down, the owner is ready and waiting.
‘Good afternoon sir, this time I remembered you and I already have the fork ready for you.’
The blind man puts the fork to his nose, takes a deep whiff and says, ‘Hey I didn't know that Mary worked here?’
Jokes for the day
After the baby was born, the panicked Japanese father went to see the obstetrician. ‘Doctor,’ he said, ‘I don't mind telling you, but I'm a little upset because my daughter has red hair. She can't possibly be mine.’
‘Nonsense,’ the doctor said. ‘Even though you and your wife both have black hair, one of your ancestors may have contributed red hair to the gene pool.’
‘It isn't possible,’ the man insisted. ‘We're pure Asian.’
‘Well,’ said the doctor, ‘let me ask you this. How often do you have sex?’
The man seemed ashamed. ‘I've been working very hard for the past year. We only made love once or twice a month.’
‘There you have it!’ the doctor said confidently. ‘It's just rust.’
‘Nonsense,’ the doctor said. ‘Even though you and your wife both have black hair, one of your ancestors may have contributed red hair to the gene pool.’
‘It isn't possible,’ the man insisted. ‘We're pure Asian.’
‘Well,’ said the doctor, ‘let me ask you this. How often do you have sex?’
The man seemed ashamed. ‘I've been working very hard for the past year. We only made love once or twice a month.’
‘There you have it!’ the doctor said confidently. ‘It's just rust.’
Jokes for the day: Catholic
Four Catholic men and a Catholic woman were having coffee.
The first Catholic man tells his friends, "My son is a priest, when he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'."
The second Catholic man chirps, "My son is a Bishop. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Grace'."
The third Catholic gent says, "My son is a Cardinal.. When he enters a room everyone says 'Your Eminence'."
The fourth Catholic man then says, "My son is the Pope. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Holiness'."
Since the lone Catholic woman was sipping her coffee in silence, the four men give her a subtle, "Well....?"
She proudly replies, "I have a daughter, slim, tall, 38D breast, 24" waist and 34" hips. When she walks into a room, people say, "Oh My God."
The first Catholic man tells his friends, "My son is a priest, when he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'."
The second Catholic man chirps, "My son is a Bishop. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Grace'."
The third Catholic gent says, "My son is a Cardinal.. When he enters a room everyone says 'Your Eminence'."
The fourth Catholic man then says, "My son is the Pope. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Holiness'."
Since the lone Catholic woman was sipping her coffee in silence, the four men give her a subtle, "Well....?"
She proudly replies, "I have a daughter, slim, tall, 38D breast, 24" waist and 34" hips. When she walks into a room, people say, "Oh My God."
Dr Jeffrey weighing his options, likely to ditch an Anwar-Azmin led-PKR
By Ezra Haganez
Kota Kinabalu, SABAH: Outgoing PKR Vice President, Dr Jeffrey Kitingan, while reiterating he is still with the Party, said right now he and his group feel at a loss ever since Zaid Ibrahim has quit the party.
"We supported Zaid because he is a man of principle, and he supported the aspirations of Sabah and Sarawak.
"We wanted leaders at the apex of PKR who understand the need and aspirations of Sabah and Sarawak but he (Zaid) has quit now. We are at a loss," said maverick Jeffrey at his press conference in Kota Kinabalu today.
According to Jeffrey, unlike Zaid, it is unknown and unheard of if any of the other PKR top central leaders who "really" respect Sabah and Sarawak's rights as equal partners in the Federation of Malaysia.
This statement indicated the man's assessment of PKR supremo Anwar Ibrahim himself, who many have wronged for what had been going on in the Party for the past few months.
Kota Kinabalu, SABAH: Outgoing PKR Vice President, Dr Jeffrey Kitingan, while reiterating he is still with the Party, said right now he and his group feel at a loss ever since Zaid Ibrahim has quit the party.
"We supported Zaid because he is a man of principle, and he supported the aspirations of Sabah and Sarawak.
"We wanted leaders at the apex of PKR who understand the need and aspirations of Sabah and Sarawak but he (Zaid) has quit now. We are at a loss," said maverick Jeffrey at his press conference in Kota Kinabalu today.
According to Jeffrey, unlike Zaid, it is unknown and unheard of if any of the other PKR top central leaders who "really" respect Sabah and Sarawak's rights as equal partners in the Federation of Malaysia.
This statement indicated the man's assessment of PKR supremo Anwar Ibrahim himself, who many have wronged for what had been going on in the Party for the past few months.
More problems in party as PKR elections come to a close
PETALING JAYA: The month-long PKR elections came to a close with more chaos plaguing the party.
Fresh claims of irregularities are being bandied about and at least two branches have closed down with members quitting en bloc.
The polls for the party’s central leadership which began on Oct 29 have been marred by protests and resignations with many members, including deputy president aspirant Datuk Zaid Ibrahim, crying foul.
The latest developments are:
● A key aide to party vice-president Datuk Dr Jeffrey Kitingan quit the party, dealing a blow to PKR in Sabah;
● A shocking statistic was revealed – the Tanjung Piai pro-tem division is made up of only a single member;
● A senior PKR leader says the party will focus on the coming general election rather than be embroiled in internal bickering.
Fresh claims of irregularities are being bandied about and at least two branches have closed down with members quitting en bloc.
The polls for the party’s central leadership which began on Oct 29 have been marred by protests and resignations with many members, including deputy president aspirant Datuk Zaid Ibrahim, crying foul.
The latest developments are:
● A key aide to party vice-president Datuk Dr Jeffrey Kitingan quit the party, dealing a blow to PKR in Sabah;
● A shocking statistic was revealed – the Tanjung Piai pro-tem division is made up of only a single member;
● A senior PKR leader says the party will focus on the coming general election rather than be embroiled in internal bickering.
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